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  <title>ADHD互助社区 : 孩子的表达和他们理解的世界——他有过什么经历</title>
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   <title><![CDATA[孩子的表达和他们理解的世界——他有过什么经历 : 大家好！我是星辰号。今天我们聊聊孩子，关于他们的表达和他们理...]]></title>
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    <![CDATA[<strong>发表人:</strong> <a href="http://www.adhd.org.cn/forum/member_profile.asp?PF=30">快乐兵兵</a><br /><strong>标题:</strong> 14354<br /><strong>发表:&nbsp;</strong> 2021/8/30  11:38am<br /><br /><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>大家好！我是星辰号。今天我们聊聊孩子，关于他们的表达和他们理解的世界。这个话题有点大，我们分几期来探讨。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>无论孩子有多大，无论是刚刚出生不久还是已经比我们自己还要高大，他首先是一个人。他有自己的思想情绪、幻想和精神追求。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>从孩子的这些想法便可以看出孩子对自己、对父母、对生活是否信任。而这种信任，对孩子的行为往往具有一定的导向作用。孩子看到的、听到的和感受到的会在他的头脑中打出各种结。这些结或多或少会让他受到伤害，甚至会让他心灵成长停滞不前。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>孩子通过自己的眼睛来观察世界。我们要小心谨慎，不要对他的举动随便下结论。我们需要倾听他的心声。我们要努力弄清楚他经历了什么，我们要明白他的感受，了解他心里在想些什么。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b style="">01</b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>-------------------</b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b style="">前逻辑思维</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>孩子的大脑还处于逐渐成熟的过程中，他还未拥有强有力的精神武器来控制自己。因为太小，他并不知道怎样假设还没有发生的事情；不懂得如何进行逻辑推理；不知道怎样从自己的想法中抽离，与其保持一定的距离或将其投射到未来。他会停留在当时的境况中，按照自己的逻辑思考问题，以自我为中心，一意孤行。孩子的这种思维方式被称为“前逻辑思维”。孩子不懂得对事情进行全盘的综合考虑，也不知道要将事情按照重要性进行排序。他不会深思熟虑，一旦有了情绪反应，就会立即受情绪控制而无法逃脱。他很容易受到情感问题的干扰，所以需要我们成年人来帮助他找到出路。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>此外，他会用自己的方式来整合和诠释自己所感知的一切，其依据就是自己拥有的那一点点信息，而这些信息往往是残缺不全甚至是扭曲变形的。因此在父母看来，孩子的情绪实在让人难以理解。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b style="">02</b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>-------------------</b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b style="">哭泣、喊叫、颤抖表达方式</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>我们虽然无法猜出孩子的脑子里究竟在想些什么，但可以做到不忽视孩子的感受。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>要知道，我们错过的任何一个我们觉得无关紧要的细节，在孩子的眼里都可能重要无比。那么，如何倾听孩子的需要并帮助他解开感情的症结呢？要让他有机会表达自己的情绪，有机会通过哭泣、喊叫、颤抖的方式来发泄内心的情感，而不是想着让他安静下来。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>哭泣、喊叫、颤抖都是表达痛苦、缓解压力和重新获得内在力量的方式。要对孩子的能力有信心，他知道这样做对自己有好处。如果孩子哭泣时你与他在一起，静静地倾听和陪伴，那么在情绪得到宣泄之后，他就会马上变得放松和自信，感到无比自在。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b style="">03</b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>-------------------</b></span></font></p><p style="text-align: center; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体" size="6"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b style="">核心问题：他有过什么经历</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>在孩子形形色色的情绪表现面前，你感到惊讶并无力应对吗？</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>你不明白到底是什么让他有这些表现吗？</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>你不知道如何帮助他顺利通过生活的考验吗？</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>请倾听他的心声，站在他的角度去思考，用他的眼睛去观察，用他的耳朵去聆听，并对自己提出这个问题：他有过什么经历？</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>关于孩子的表达和他们理解的世界，我们将分成7个专题探讨。今天是第一个他有过什么经历。下次我们探讨第二个，他想表达的到底是什么？</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;">这篇文章有同步的音频，您可以在喜马拉雅或微信公众号，找到《北辰星辰号》</p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>&nbsp;</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b><br></b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>敬请大家关注。</b></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><br></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; outline: 0px; max-width: 100%; clear: both; min-height: 1em; text-align: justify; -sizing: border- !imant; overflow-wrap: break-word !imant;"><font color="#333333" face="宋体"><span style="font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 0.544px;"><b>我是星辰号，一个在心理学公司做产品的理工男，我在张衡路1000弄17号和大家分享每天学到的心理学知识。欢迎大家关注我的微信公众号，北辰星辰号。我将在这里和大家分享心理学和人生体验。</b></span></font></p>]]>
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   <pubDate>Mon, 30 Aug 2021 11:38:53 +0000</pubDate>
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